Putting Off The Old Me

This morning, I opened my Bible and landed in Ephesians 4. And honestly… I didn’t expect it to hit me the way it did.

There’s a part of me that genuinely wants to live for Christ. Not halfway. Not on the surface. But with my whole life, my mind, my heart, and even my body.

But if I’m being real, my actions don’t always reflect that. I still struggle. I still stumble. I still find myself going back to things I know aren’t good for me. And afterward, I sit there feeling guilty, wondering why I can’t seem to get it right.

Then I read this:

“That, however, is not the way of life you learned when you heard about Christ and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught… to put off your old self… to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.” (Ephesians 4:20–24)

And something in me just paused. Because that verse doesn’t say “you should already be perfect.” It describes a process: put off, be made new, put on. Over and over again. It’s not just about believing in Jesus. It’s about transformation.

Being “renewed” is a transformation of the mind. Not just knowing what’s right, but actually learning to think differently, to see differently, and to respond differently. And that made something click for me. Maybe the reason I keep going back to the same struggles isn’t because I don’t love God enough. Maybe it’s because my mind is still learning how to be renewed.

Another thing I thought about was the “old self” being shaped by deceitful desires. That word deceitful matters. Because sin doesn’t show up looking destructive. It shows up looking comforting, easy, like a quick escape from loneliness, stress, or desire. But it never actually satisfies. It just keeps the cycle going.

And then there was this:

“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32)

I’ve read that verse so many times in the context of forgiving others, but today it hit differently. Because I realized I struggle to accept that same forgiveness for myself. I hold onto guilt like it’s part of my identity. But if God has forgiven me, why am I still trying to carry what He already let go of?

I don’t have this all figured out. I’m not writing this as someone who has mastered self-control or overcome every struggle. I’m writing this as someone who is in the middle of it, someone who is tired of going back and genuinely wants to live differently.

Ephesians 4 didn’t leave me feeling condemned. It challenged me. It reminded me that change is possible, but it is also intentional.

It’s not just: “I want to be better.”
It’s: “I’m choosing to put off the old me, renew my mind, and put on who God is calling me to be.”
Over and over again.

~~*~~

Today, my prayer is simple:

God,
I don’t want to live the way I used to. Teach me how to be renewed. Help me walk in the new life You’ve already given me.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen.

If you’re struggling too, just know this:

You’re not alone.
You’re not beyond change.
And you’re not disqualified just because you’re still in the process.